Sunday, May 8, 2011

This is what Audit is? - A Funny Story...


Once upon a time there was a shepherd looking after his sheep
on the side of a deserted road.

Suddenly a brand new Porsche screeches to a halt. The driver, a
man dressed in an Armani suit, Cerutti shoes, Ray-Ban
sunglasses, TAG-Heuer wrist-watch, and a Pierre Cardin tie gets
out and asks the shepherd,

'If I can tell you how many sheep you have, will you give me
one of them?'

The shepherd looks at the young man, then looks at the large
flock of grazing sheep and replies, 'Okay.'

The young man parks the car, connects his laptop to the
mobile-fax, enters a NASA Website, scans the ground using his
GPS, opens a database and 60 Excel tables filled with
algorithms and pivot tables.
He then prints out a 150-page report on his high-tech
mini-printer, tu rns to the shepherd and says,

'You have exactly 1,586 sheep.'

The shepherd cheers, 'That's correct, you can have your sheep.'

The young man takes one of the animals from the flock and puts
it in the back of his Porsche.

The shepherd looks at him and asks, 'If I guess your
profession, will you return my animal to me ?'

The young man answers, 'Yes, why not?'

The shepherd says, 'You are an auditor.'

'How did you know?' asks the young man.

'Very simple,' answers the shepherd. '

Firstly, you came here without being wanted.

Secondly, you charged me a fee to tell me something I already
knew.

Thirdly, you don't understand anything about my business.... '

'.....Now can I have my dog back?